I Saw A Film!

A kind of excuse to show off naked ladies and have a thriller, with a killer on the loose, with a sort of karate vs. boxing match for the finale. I often remark that people who enjoy these sorts of action films, that culminate in some variety of fist-fight, but don’t like pro-wrestling, are silly. This movie is about 50% boobies and 40% Pro-wrasslin’ and about 10% gritty meanness.

We have Melanie Griffith (do I love Melanie? Yes I do, especially Body Double), Dawn Rae Chong (a couple months out from Commando), and Maria Conchita Alonso (a couple years out from Running Man and Predator 2, I’m starting to sense a pattern here) and a few others as these risque dancers who get hired out to various clubs in some sort of seedy red-light district, by a little company headed up by a curly-headed Tom Berenger. I guess “Pimp” isn’t quite the right word, but the feel is much the same as he argues with Marie Conchita and seems to pay her in singles for a night’s work. Meanwhile a decrepit soundtrack of fake pop-rock blares along setting the stage of the grimy city. We also get handsome Billy Dee Williams as a burned out cop, spitting racist epithets left and right and desiring to shut all the sex-pot operations down.

While we get to see a lot of Melanie’s rump, it’s kind of a shame there’s not much in the way of any even slightly passable dancing going on, but I suppose that’s not what men at these clubs are interested in. If the ladies take off their clothes and simulate sex that’s pretty much the game. Of course, in this town, the fellows in these clubs are super interactive. They’re all glued to the shows in throngs and rolling their eyes, shouting and fidgeting like kids who have to go pee. Lucky for the ladies, they’ll likely get some tip dollars. Unlucky for the ladies there’s a Karate killer living in a nearby warehouse doing nunchuck forms in his birthday suit. This actor is basically a total unknown, which is a bit interesting. IMDB says his name is Neil Clifford, uncredited. Stealing much of the show is Rockford Files actor Joe Santos, who adds gravity as well as some levity as the agitation about who the killer might be grows.

This is running free on USA prime. My dad and I had a bit of a discussion of why the Karate fellow lost to such sloppy boxing (despite the deadly out-of-focus remembrances of Berenger’s brutality). Our decision was that our karate-killer paused and gloated over his success– much like a wrestling heel, giving the boxing protagonist a chance to recover and try a different tact. Silly pro-wrestling stuff. It also brought to mind those Japanese shops where impossibly adorable young women will pretend to be your pal for tips, which have been profiled on a variety of shows including an amusing recent series by James May (Our Man In Japan). Aside from directly being sexual with a paying client, there appears a market for attractive people to earn cash while pretending to be friends with unattractive people (Or perhaps just too busy or broken to create relationships of their own). I don’t know what to think of it but it seems at least slightly sociopathic. But then nurses and doctors are people who pretend to care for money too!

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